2 plus 2 will always equal four… but beyond that, 2 times 2 will also be four. Every single time. It’s the only math fact where the sum and product are equal. It’s like the perfect anomaly.
Relationally speaking, maybe that’s the goal. To find another 2 so that the relationship aligns where the end result is the end result no matter if you’re adding or multiplying. In my world a factor that looks like a 4 is enough to get you in the door for sure. If you come off as a 2, and the sum is giving 4 then great… but when we bring multiplying into our equation, the product should still be 4… if I get anything less than that, then that means circumstantially one of us is not giving “2”. It may be a 3 and 1 or a 0 and 4…. But either way, anything other than a 2 and 2 is not what I want.
And I’m just at that place of wanting and feeling deserving of what I want… I want my special math fact… my anomaly. Niggas suck at math tho lol. And when they tell me that, I’ma start running because that’s right up there with a man calling me “big money” at this point.
I think if I’m going to keep trying this dating thing, I have to have a criteria for compartmentalizing when it’s a 2, 3, 4 situation. I’m going to shift from arithmetic to sports for a second. Yes, you want 2+2 to yield 4, but when classifying these scenarios, the 2 and 2 set up is the only case where you win in love. So, it’s only fair to categorize these math facts (3+1, 4+0, 2+2) in terms of wins and losses.
0-4 (oh and four) or 4-0 (four and oh)
When we talk about sports we put the wins before losses. So, when discussing the Bull’s 72-10 record in the ’95/’96 NBA season, the reason it’s so memorable is because out of 82 games, the Bulls won roughly 88% of their games, which was more than any other team that year. So, yeah. Not to get too far off topic but wins then losses. Obviously, 0-4 is real dookie slush.
I like to see this as the worst case scenario and I don’t think I have to put too many words to it. An 0-4 situation is basically, you’re putting all the effort in to get the ball down the court. If they aren’t at least on offense with you, meaning you don’t have someone to pass the ball to, it’s not safe. CALL TIME OUT IMMEDIATELY. I mean, you don’t have to take a break, but you’re definitely wasting your time. 0-4 means they’re not at all interested despite the wording that may come out of their mouths or in those text threads.
You know those scenarios (hopefully not up close), where one person texts first all the time, one person is putting in the effort to initiate time and dates but the other person always has an excuse as to why those plans can never seem to leave the ground… it’s just not good nor is it real. I think when you’re in a 1-3 or 3-1 situation, its really easy to slip into a 0 and 4 type situation. In fact, I’d bet that in a 1-3 or 3-1 situation more often than not, there will be 0-4 moments… I’d like to reiterate that an 0-4 or 4-0 situation means, one person is carrying all the feelings, emotion, chemistry and connection while the other person has none.
You’re probably thinking “3 wins and 1 loss isn’t bad Sheppard”, but it’s not measuring wins and loss in the sports aspect, it’s all about interest and feelings. Either way you look at it, someone is carrying most of the affection and someone is on their way out… the goal is to both be all in. So yeah. 3-1…
3-1 (three and one)
This honestly may be the most exhausting case. I think this scenario happens way more than a 0-4 or 4-0. And it’s sooo tricky, because you could really be so inspired and hopeful that you don’t see they’re not invested like you… that 1 gives just enough to keep you hoping eventually you’ll get to the 2-2. It’s very vague, unclear, and uncomfortable. Some days it feels like you’re really locked in but most days you’re left in the dark. You often wonder if a relationship is what they really want because the plan of action usually falls short of what you’re wanting and needing. When you make advances to know them on a deeper level to establish emotional availability, they don’t show up and it feels like you’re pulling teeth.
Basically, this is as unclear as it gets. It’s worse (to me) than 0-4 because that’s usually pretty clear lol. You have to be blind, unintelligent, and in denial for an 0-4. But that 3-1… you don’t want to walk away because you’re so close to a 2-2 and getting there is usually what keeps you in the game. The pursuit of the championship ring. A really great season. The person might even be on the offense with you, but half the time you’re wondering “would you rather be on the bench?” Or “did you come to play or????”…. it’s just a lot of uncertainty. Usually there is some chemistry and the chemistry could be very strong…when it’s strong; but it’s not enough to keep the connection consistent. And that’s what keeps you from reaching 2-2.
I could say more, but hopefully you get the point. 3-1 has not proven to be worth it and I’m exhausted just contemplating the millions of examples that fall under this category.
2-2 (two and two)
The anomaly. The Bulls in ’95. MJ in 1990… honorable mention Wilt Chamberlain in ’62. Can we have multiple shots at a 2-2? I guess so? I don’t see why not? The Bulls won a few rings, so… maybe it’s possible. But to have at least one is enough. The 2-2 paradigm is one where the commitment and feelings are mutual. I don’t mean, y’all love each other equally, I mean both parties are available, invested, and committed to making the connection grow and work. I could probably list some more explicit examples but… then I’d be writing from a place of speculation based on logic and not experience. Unfortunately, I can’t think of any explicit examples right now because niggas love to be vague chile. Now, there’ve been some really fun “ones” though, FOR SURE. Lol. A time is normally had but… not lasting and not at all healthy. I’m in a place now where I’m looking for the fun to never end. Honorable mention: I’ve been a “one” too… like once or twice 🥴👀 and that’s on my momma on my hood. (Because it goes both ways). But anyway. We’re a 2… looking to match with another 2… but not just any 2. My 2. ❤️